A Step-by-Step Plan to Feel Better Instantly
Some days I wake up and I feel weird. Other days, I wake up and I feel great and plan all these things to do, but then a few hours later I’ve suddenly lost all my motivation to do anything. Like anything at all — not even lie in bed and watch a movie. And sometimes, the day has been okay, but I just break down in the evening crying, no idea why. We all have those days where we just feel weird and can’t put a finger on it. Sometimes there is a little sadness or depression in the weirdness, but mostly it just feels off.
In the past, I have fought these days like the pest. I’ve beaten myself up for the way I am feeling — which in fact usually made matters even worse, because then the weirdness prolonged over days, sometimes weeks. But over time, I have learned that there is always a reason behind the weirdness. In fact, I believe it’s the universe knocking at your door trying to tell you something. And if you listen and pay attention to how you are treating yourself on the weirdness filled day you might get to the core of what’s going on pretty fast.
Here is my step by step plan to dealing with days where you feel off:
Step 1: Stop whatever you are doing
Take a moment to reflect. This is especially important when the weirdness appears first thing in the morning and you feel like you got up on the wrong foot. Sit down on your meditation pillow or on the floor, shut all doors and close your eyes for just a few minutes. Observe your thoughts and ask yourself “How am I feeling today?”. Let your thoughts run by and just be still for a few minutes.
Step 2: Write down your feelings
Pick a piece of paper and do some journaling. Ask yourself the following questions and just write down whatever comes to your mind:
- Is there anything external that could play with my emotions right now (your period, the weather, or are you just tired or hungry)?
→ If yes, cut yourself some slack, get some sleep or food and take care of yourself (move to step 4).
- How did I experience the last few days? What happened? Anything that strikes out?
- Could there be something that I am carrying around subconsciously?Examples might include:
– a new worry that emerged this week
– something that just doesn’t feel right (like a decision you took)
– an unresolved conflict
– something that goes against who you are, how you want your life to be or your general values
– an important decision you need to take
All of the things above could subconsciously be affecting how you feel without you being aware of it. By consciously asking yourself these questions, you can usually get to the root cause of feeling off quite fast.
Step 3: Deal with it!
Sometimes, identifying the underlying reason might take longer. In that case, move to Step 4 and return to step 2 and 3 later in the day/week. If however, you were already able to identify the underlying reason for your feelings, it’s time to tackle them head-on and move on!
My favorite way of dealing with something is making a plan and writing it down. Why? Because it requires you to actually think of a solution and write it down. This process gets the worry or problem out of your head and on paper and thus you are able to release the subconscious weird feelings.
Before I moved from my hometown Innsbruck to a flat in Vienna, I felt really weird and everything grossed me out (I saw dirt in my car and bathroom I never saw before and the thought of eating made me wanna throw up). When I sat down to meditate, I realized that I was grossed out by the flat I was about to move into. When I visited the flat, it was all messy and dirty. It is very important for me personally to live in a clean space — otherwise, I can’t be productive and don’t feel comfortable. The thing was, I knew it was the right decision to take the flat because I needed a place to stay for the first few months to get settled in Vienna. But I knew I needed to deal with it in order to feel better.
So I did the following:
1) I called the guy who rented the apartment to me and asked him to remove all of his stuff except for the furniture.
2) I arranged a cleaning lady to come a day before I moved to Vienna to clean everything.
3) I made a plan of how I will rearrange the furniture and deal with the pieces that grossed me out (e.g. put a new cover on the couch.
Just by making a plan about how to deal with it, writing it down and following it through, I felt a lot better and was able to get on with my day. I also ended up really enjoying my stay in Vienna!
Step 4: Take care of yourself
If you don’t feel significantly better after step 3, it is important to take extra care of yourself today. Take at least 2–3 hours off and get your mind off things.
Ask yourself: what would I do today if I would want to be extra kind to myself? And then go an do it. My favorite ways of taking care of myself include:
- Taking a long bath in the middle of the day and listen to my favorite comedians on speaker
- Go to my gym to JUST use the sauna and wellness area
- Go to my favorite local grocery store and buy lots of amazing things like avocado, dried tomato, fresh pasta, pesto and the like and then cook a meal just for myself while listening to great music
- Go for a run in nature
- Go for a dance class
- Take a nap!
Reassess how you feel after that and get on with your day/work/whatever you need to do. If you still feel weird, make sure to continue being kind to yourself and give yourself what you need.
A few extra tips to get out of the weirdness state if the step by step process did not help:
- Take a shower and get dressed. Sounds basic? Maybe, but taking a proper shower and making the effort to wear something nice usually gets you into an entirely different state of mind.
- Change your body to change your mind: jump into cold water, go into a sauna, do an intense workout or do anything else that drastically changes the temperature or feeling of your body.
- Avoid staying at home all day, since it can aggravate your weird feelings. Instead, just head out — go for a coffee in the city, watch other people in the tram or take a walk in nature. Just get out and I promise you’ll feel better afterward because it keeps you from unnecessarily over-catastrophizing things.
- Avoid overeating! If you are like me, binge eating will severely deepen in my issues and destroy any chance to turn the day around, as it kickstarts my self-pity and basically chains me to bed with bad TV shows and more food.
- Talk to people! I know you probably don’t feel like talking at all. But trust me, talking to someone else will put everything into perspective and bring yourself back to normality. Talk to the cashier about the weather, chat with your mum about the neighbors and listen to your best friends dating disasters. You will soon realize: your life is not that bad.
Liz Huber is a Mindset & Productivity Coach and Founder of refinedlife.io. With her books, courses, and 1-on-1 work, she helps entrepreneurs overcome overwhelm, lack of focus, fear, and self-doubt. As a result, her clients are able to confidently achieve their goals by prioritizing what is truly important and streamlining everything else.